by Myfun
At the Bad Girls Bible, we recommend that most people try anal sex and playing with anal toys because of how fun and pleasurable it can be. But getting used to it – and learning how to take bigger toys – isn’t always easy or obvious. That’s why we wrote this guide that teaches you how to train for anal sex and play.
Anal Sex Podcast
Before we jump in, you may want listen to my anal sex podcast to learn some powerful anal sex tips for intense orgasms. You’ll disover 11 things you must do in order to make it wildly pleasurable, fun & satisfying and avoid any pain, embarrasment or mess.
Side note: If you are currently struggling to orgasm during sex or masturbation, then you may want to learn about the Easy Orgasm Solution. It will teach you how to have multiple vaginal and full body orgasms during sex and masturbation. It works even if you currently struggle to orgasm during sex or when masturbating.
Anal Training Two Ways
Two types of anal training that usually come to mind: training for anal sex (for the first time) and anal stretching after you’ve become comfortable with basic anal play, which requires more time and patience to do. We’ll start with preparing for anal sex.
One of the main reasons why people don’t want to try anal – aside from the fact that this is where you poop from – is that it will hurt. Yes, it can hurt, but it shouldn’t. This is especially true if you’re properly prepared.
Here’s a post about what to do if anal sex hurts.
For this reason, the decision to have anal sex should never be one that you make at the spur of the moment, and anal should never be a surprise – for you. It can make a sexy surprise for your man once you’ve prepared, however!
Intense Squirting: You can learn how to squirt effortlessly and with intense pleasure if you use the right techniques. If you’re interested in learning how to squirt (alone and with your partner), you may want to check out the Squirting Magic guide.
What does preparation entail? First, you need to be mentally ready. If you’re at all unsure about whether you want anal, you’re probably going to tense up. Tense muscles will make penetration more difficult and painful, which leads to the very thing you were worried about to begin with.
So you need to be mentally relaxed, allowing your body to relax physically. For some people, a glass of wine might do the trick. You might receive a sensual massage (more on that here) from your man to melt all your stress away. If you’re already fooled around and perhaps had an orgasm, you’ll likely be feeling pretty sated, and that might be the right time for anal.
You know yourself best, so pay attention to your gut. Speaking of gut, read this post about anal during pregnancy if you’re curious. We’ve also got answers to your questions about getting pregnant from anal sex.
Preparing for Anal Sex
Secondly, we have physical preparation for anal sex. You may not be worried about the pain. Your concern may be about being clean and preventing any issues with fecal matter, which is a concern that many people share.
Fortunately, that sort of training for anal sex is usually less intensive than you’d imagine. For most people, having a bowel movement before cleans everything out. You can Wipe with a wet wipe or shower, and some people like to shave their butt cheeks and around their anus to be smooth and soft. But that’s optional.
If you want to be immaculate to prevent any potential mishaps, one option you can consider is an anal douche. It looks a bit like a dropper. You fill it with room temperate water – never hot or cold – and sit over the toilet while you squeeze the water from the bulb to your anal tract to clean out any fecal matter.
Read More: Preparing for Anal Sex
An enema is typically overkill unless that’s one of your fetishes. But you can buy the device from many sex stores and hook it up to your shower or faucet for the ultimate in clean. It’ll require a lot more time and effort, however, than just douching.
Talk dirty confidently: It’s surprisingly easy to turn a man on and have him lusting for you, by using a few simple dirty phrases. You’ll find these dirty phrases in the Wild Dirty Talk Guide. You’ll also learn how to confidently say them.
So now you’re prepared for anal sex, clean and calm. What’s next? We advise against simply sticking a penis or toy in your butt without warming up no matter how horny you might be!
Related: Try these positions for pegging your partner and also these anal sex positions.
Time for Penetration
It’s smart to start smaller. Maybe a small toy as long as it has a flared base or handle that allows it to be safe for anal play, a finger (find out why anal fingering is the best) or two or even your partner’s tongue (tips for rim jobs). Learn more about anal rimming. These smaller body parts or toys can pass the tight ring of muscles known as the sphincter that prevents items from passing in or out of your anus [1].
This is actually why anal sex feels so good for men. Discover other reasons that men like anal.
As your anus becomes used to the sensation, you can add a finger or increase toy size. Soon enough, you’ll be able to comfortably take a penis or penis-sized toy. Of course, you should definitely use lube. We recommend lube for all kinds of sex, but it’s especially important with anal sex because your anus isn’t able to self-lubricate.
Learn more about lube and how it makes for better sex.
You may be on your way to having an orgasm from anal sex or wearing a butt plug during sex. Awesome!
Quick Quiz: Do You Give Lousy Blow Jobs?
If you are new here, then you may want to take the quiz below to learn how good you are at giving oral sex and satisfying your man. You may discover you that you suck (pun intended) or that you are already a blow job queen.
Read: How to Have Anal Orgasms
When You Want to Get Serious About Anal Training
Maybe you’re an anal aficionado, so the previous advice doesn’t really apply to you. Perhaps you want to see how much you can comfortably take or you are in a power exchange relationship with a partner who has instructed you to train yourself to take larger anal toys. Anal penetration can feel especially submissive.
If this sounds like you, read on to learn how to seriously train for anal sex.
Toy Size
Being able to take a larger toy or penis is much like training for anal sex the first time. You start small; although, you may be able to take a medium toy (having a diameter around 1.5″) or your partner’s penis without much warming as you become more experienced.
After you’re comfortably penetrated, you want to increase the size of the toy or move from your partner’s penis to a larger toy. You can buy toys specifically to feel full – and people who enjoy larger toys are often known as size queens. Any reputable retailer should be able to tell you about the circumference of the toy (the measurement around the shaft) or the diameter (the measurement from one side of the shaft to the other. This is the same as the circumference divided by 3.14 (Pi aka π)).
Toys known as dilators exist specifically to help with vaginal penetration , and you’ll find similar anal/rectal dilators that are safe to use in your back door.
Remember to be realistic. What seems like a modest increase in size on paper can feel huge, literally, in your body. Increasing the diameter by 1/4″ (.25″0 inches is a good start; although, you may be able to skip some diameters in between. You may eventually find yourself playing with a toy that you never thought was possible to use anally!
You might not be able to insert a larger toy that you’ve been lusting after, or you may only be able to do it for a little at a time. That’s okay. Anal training requires time and patience, so be easy on yourself.
Quick Warning: This video is wild… However, it will teach you how to give blow jobs that will make your man cry with pleasure and become sexually addicted to you. If you are interested in having him completely obsessed with you and only you, then check out the detailed (& explicit!) oral sex tutorial video here.
You can always insert a toy again or go bigger next time. But you can’t undo any damage that you’ve done by going too fast or getting ahead of yourself.
Make sure to remain relaxed and use plenty of lube whenever you insert a new toy.
Psst, men can anal train, too. In fact, anal penetration is great for prostate massage.
Numbing Products
There are a few options to consider. For example, numbing creams designed for anal sex promise to take away any potential pain with the use of lidocaine or similar chemicals. But what the product packaging doesn’t tell you is that pain can be useful. It’s your body’s way of saying “Slow down,” “Relax,” “Use more lube,” or “Try a different angle.” Pain is a message that you should heed.
If you numb pain, you won’t know that anything is wrong. If you ignore it, you can similarly wind up doing damage. For example, anal play that’s too rough could lead to anal prolapse and incontinence. If you use a toy that’s too big, you could cause trauma to your colon. Not only is that pain more long-term, but the visit to the doctor is also going to be uncomfortable.
Find out more dos and don’t for anal play in this guide to anal sex safety.
Communicating With Your Partner
Finally, it’s important to communicate with your partner. During anal masturbation, you pick the toy and control the pace. You can respond immediately if something feels off. But a partner doesn’t have the same cues, so you need to communicate with them about it.
Possibly useful: If you want to give your man (& yourself) back-arching, toe-curling, screaming orgasms that will keep him sexually addicted to you, then you’ll find them in my private and discreet newsletter. You’ll also learn the 5 dangerous & “dumb” sex mistakes that turn him off and how to avoid them.
Because talking about sex can be so difficult, we’ve written a guide to sexual communication. Use it to make it easy to talk to your partner about your needs and improve your experience with all kinds of sex, not just anal.
Do you want to anally penetrate your man? It’s time to consider using a strap-on. Then discover everything you need to know about pegging.
Get more tips like these in our post about anal sex.
Hopefully, you’ve learned that you can mitigate pain when it comes to anal sex or anal training just by taking your time and the right precautions. But you’ll inevitably reach a point where you can’t go any larger, and that’s okay. We all have our limits.
You can enjoy finding them, both by yourself or with a partner using these tips for anal training.
Now that you know a bit more about training for anal sex, you can set goals for yourself and try to meet the challenges. Anal training might be necessary to enjoy anal sex, or it can be a fun part of your sex games. Either way, we hope you enjoy!
Orgasm Every Time. Easily. Here’s How…
I want to tell you about my friend Karen.
Karen came to me one day. She was hysterical.
She told me that her marriage was falling apart because she and her husband didn’t have satisfying sex.
Every time they were intimate, Karen was faking her orgasms. It turns out she couldn’t orgasm during sex.
In fact…
She never had an orgasm in her entire life. Not one!
This left her feeling embarrassed and ashamed. And…
She completely hid this from her husband. Thankfully…
It turns out that there is a way for any woman to orgasm. Easily. And have multiple vaginal and full body orgasms during sex and masturbation.
I shared the process with Karen.
After she followed the simple process, she could barely come to terms with how…
Quickly and dramatically her sex life changed.
We met up a few months later and…
She would not stop talking about it,
“I thought I was one of those women who couldn’t orgasm. I used to think I was ‘broken’ and ‘unfixable.’ This saved my sex life, and that saved my marriage.”
Even if you currently struggle to orgasm during sex or when masturbating, this process will also work for you.
And best of all, you don’t need to do anything weird or uncomfortable to start having the best orgasms and sex of your life.
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